Turning Dreams into Reality

Some people say your dreams are actually what your heart really wants to happen. Things that has not materialized in reality but you'd really want it to....For the past week, i've had some lovely lovely dreams in my sleep. So real, sometimes when i wake i think it has happened already.

My dream was seeing Gabe run while laughing. Giggling all the way. Taunting me to catch him. Playing "catch me if u can Mummy".....yes it's a wonderful dream...it hasn't materialized yet...but i know it will soon. Coz it was too real not to be true. I cannot wait for that day to come. That is one of my MAJOR MILESTONE for Gabe. I want to bring him to parks and run with him, see the huge smile on his face when he discovers this sense of freedom.

I don't think I am really that Kiasu of a mum, but yet i know when it comes to Gabe, sometimes maybe i push him abit too hard. In terms of his feeding, eating, sitting and crawling. I make him try as hard as he can, sometimes I am harsh with him. But i only want the best for him. He has to work 10 times as hard and if I don't push him, I fear he'd never get there or get there too slowly. I know the therapists say he has his own pace. But that doesn't mean he can't get there SOONER right?

That's the reason i'm always pushing him to do exercises at home. Before he could sit up without hands, everyday a few times i will sit with him and make him practice. Even while he is at his play station. I'd be forever dangling tissues at him to encourage him to crawl. Now, I am proud to say that he's managed both...crawling he has abit more touch up to do, but it's getting very strong. admit that therapy does help, but i also have to say if i didn't let him do it at home, he'd be much slower.

Some think that raising a DS kid is same as raising a normal kid, just slower. I agree that 80% of the time it is often true. But there is that 20% that outweighs the 80%. It's hard, much harder than you think. Everyday is a worry. Everyday is a challenge to make him do exercises but making it seem like we're playing. Searching on the internet to read what other mums are doing for their child. Applying it to Gabe...Thinking what type of foods help him put on weight faster. What types of food makes it easier for him to swallow. Is he eating enough. Is his heart Ok...the list goes on and on.

It takes a lot of patience and time. That is why if you look around, most mums with DS kids do not hand over their child to others to look after. There is no one on earth who can teach special kids with so much love n patience other than the mum themselves. It's a tiring process needing much dedication. So no i do not want to just hire a maid and let her look after my child. Neither do i need help, unless it's from God himself. Yes it's challenging and tiring for me, but so rewarding. When i saw him crawl i felt so proud. I realized that all my efforts paid off. When i see him sit without hand support now, i thank God for giving me the patience to sit with him everyday, waiting for him to improve.

Now, my goal is to push him to walk. This is the hardest part. His feet, when standing are still a bit curled in, not completely flat. So he needs to work on that. Everyday, we either use his play station as support or the sofa. And i slowly adjust his feet for him. And i'm planning to get a walker to encourage him. And i won't stop until he can do it.

The dream perhaps is telling me that this milestone will happen soon but i need to help Gabe work toward it. And work toward it I will. Once he can walk, i am gonna buy him tons n tons of shoes! Nice shoes in every color possible! We're gonna roam the parks in Tokyo like there's no tomorrow.

Gabe, the grasses and parks are waiting for you to make your mark. Mummy is so waiting to hold your hand and run with you and walk everywhere your heart desires.

I'm waiting for you to turn my dream into reality sweetie.....